Thursday, August 09, 2007

Good Grief

Hoss and Little Joe need haircuts. Badly.

It is going to take a miracle for that to happen.

I can change their diapers, bathe them, dress them, feed them, take them to the doctor, register them for daycare or school (Hoss will start a special education program in the fall), clip their fingernails and toenails, and brush their teeth. In fact, I am expected to do these things.

I cannot, however, cut their hair without birth mom's permission.

Which, past events have shown, is highly unlikely (read: when hell freezes over) to happen.

She apparently has a real issue with the boys' having their haircut. As in, she doesn't want their hair cut. Ever.

Unless she does it. mental image: boys with hair that looks like someone went mad with a pair of rusty hedge clippers.

Today the social worker called to tell me that the termination petition has been filed.

I am ashamed to admit that one of my first thoughts was this: "does this mean I can get their hair cut?"

Bigger news: mom has made a court date for tomorrow afternoon to voluntarily sign away her parental rights to both boys.

Will she show up? That is anybody's guess.

I will keep you all posted.

*** forgot to mention this. Hoss is working very hard to understand the concept of names. He still cannot answer the question "what is your name?" But he does ask it of us. repeatedly. At least, I think that is what he is asking us. We are both hoping that the speech therapy he will get in school will help him in this area. Poor kid, 3 years old, and can't tell you his name if you ask it. He can say his name, if you prompt him. but the question "What is your name?" throws him completely. He can, however, say with perfect clarity "Holy Shit." Go figure. Little Joe, on the other hand, says only "no no no" and "uhuh". He does, however, do a great imiation of a dog growl and will, if you aren't watching him carefully, crawl on his hands and knees to the dog bowl and eat out of it by bending his mouth down into the dish and grabbing at nuggets with his teeth. Gross. Very gross. I am trying to be postive about it and see it as a sign of imaginative play. Let's hope his early on intervention teacher sees it the same way.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Seriously you can't get their hair cut? That is nuts. I really hope she shows up to court. Otherwise I guess you could do some masculine looking pony-tails or something?

Jennifer G. said...

I admire your dedication to these two vulnerable lives -- finally someone making a positive difference for them.

LaLa said...

I hope she shows up and all works out like it should. You are doing such a good job with them. The haircut thing is annoying I know...hopefully it won't be an issue much longer (just no mullets please LOL)

Anonymous said...

I hope for everyone's sake she shows up. About the hair cut thing, is it possible it's cultural and related to their Native American heritage? I have no idea, just wondering if there's more to that on the birth mom's part. Anyway, good luck and keep it up.

Dianna said...

I hope she shows up tomorrow! And I'm sure some formalized help will help Hoss with his speech. My cousin has a 3 year old son whose entire vocabulary consisted of 10 words before speech therapy. Three months later, the difference is amazing!

Anonymous said...

You can't cut their hair? Good grief. I mean, I can almost see keeping it long because that is how she wants it as long as you are allowed to keep it, oh, I don't know, straight and tidy. But please, if she is to the point in her parenting that that they have filed a termination petition, why does she get to force them to look bad? Like their lives aren't difficult enough.

Jen said...

I agree that this may be part of native american culture--is it long enough to restrain with a pony tail or topknot?

I love that Hoss can say holy shit with perfect aclarity. Monkey see--Monkey do. Those little guys have a long road ahead of them in overcoming neglect....good thing they have you in their lives.

Melanie said...

That's the thing that kills me. No haircuts or ear piercings without parental consent and no vitamins without a doctors authorization. Okay, their b-parent can be a total poo toward them but if I want them to look presentable in public I have to get permission. Grrrr...policies are so irritating some time. Hang in there. It WILL get better.